Sunday, July 1, 2012

Meet my new personal trainer

Kipling.

Yup. As recently as yesterday I was casting aspersions on young Kipling.

I rather mockingly suggested that he was a poor choice as a fitness guru.

Then I read this in the New York Times.

I take it all back.

As is often the case, Kipling is way ahead of the curve, while I'm so far behind it I can't even see which way the latest trend is going.

According to the Times you can be crowding your 70's and be a personal trainer. So young Kipling is indeed young.

And while the Times makes no mention of how the weed of wisdom can figure into one's fitness plan, Kipling sat me down and spelled it out.

He has modified the standard hemp smoothie breakfast regimen specifically for me. I will be permitted to smoke the hemp.

But cigarettes are out, he says.

That sounds a little dodgy to me, but I'm willing to give it a try. I had thought that Kipling has a smoke break in the middle of his daily 10k run, but apparently I was mis-informed.

Like I said, I'm way behind the curve.

He's got me on the weight training as well. According to Kipling you have to lift something weightier than a Moosehead tallboy to keep the biceps toned.

Who knew?


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