Friday, February 24, 2012

Pentagon announces new Apology Center

Pentagon media spokesperson Susan Blackmore today announced the creation of a task force that will study the feasibility of an Apology Center.

The Apology Center will augment the usual Pentagon news briefings and will streamline the process of Pentagon news delivery.

"We have found that far too much time in our normal news briefings is spent on apologizing." Blackmore said. "It's come to the point where routine mission announcements and declarations of victory have been delayed because the communications infrastructure is tied up with one apology after another."

In the past week alone the Pentagon has held thirty-seven apology briefings. Apologies have been made for everything from the rape of military cadets to the unintended vaporizing of Pakistani farm families in drone strikes to the now infamous Koran burnings in Afghanistan.

"Hopefully our Pentagon news briefings will be able to focus on good news instead of the constant stream of apologies," Blackmore added.

Pending a successful feasibility study, construction of the Apology Center is expected to be completed in 2015.

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