Sunday, January 29, 2012

Adelson fumes as losers pile on the Gingrich bandwagon

Oh Sheldon, I see Herman Cain has just endorsed our boy Newt!

Herman Cain, you know, the black guy.

The pizza guy? Mr. 9-9-9? HE ENDORSED WHO?  NOT OUR NEWT OH MY GOD SO HELP ME JEEZUS I CAN'T BELIEVE WE JUST WASTED 10 MILLION ON THAT IDIOT!!!

Calm down, Sheldon. I just read a very kind profile about you on one of the Brit websites. They're a long way from asking nosy questions about exactly how you turned a trade show into a personal fortune worth billions.

But I feel your pain. Yesterday it was Sarah Palin coming out for your boy. If that wasn't bad enough, now you've got the Hermanator on your team.

And what a team it is, Sheldon. Stay with me for a minute. You got Newt, the wily carpetbagger who can't keep his pants on, and then you've got Cain, the wily pizza mogul who can't keep his pants on...

I see a whole new franchise here, Sheldon, and it's got nothing to do with gambling. It would be good to diversify anyway.

Panzeroffy's.

I don't really have to explain it, do I Sheldon? Panzerotti - Panzeroffy?

Go for it. You're paying them anyway, why not get something back for your money?

PANZEROFFY'S PIZZA AND DELI, a Sheldon Adelson company.

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