Sunday, September 18, 2011

"Rolling hash joints and relaxing on mattresses"

Alright readers, today's title is a quote. Where are we? Woodstock? Strawberry Fields? At the drive-in movies in the back of your pick-up truck in 1968? Wrong, wrong, and wrong again.

Nosiree. We are with our Libyan rebels on the front lines in the battle for Sirte. Last stronghold (except for the other ones) of the Gaddafi Loyalists. The quote appears on The CBS news site in an article by Ryan Lucas.

Seems like after the daily retreat our rebels like to kick back and let the NATO bombers do the heavy lifting. So there they are, rolling hash joints and relaxing on mattresses. No scummy WWI-style trench warfare for our lads. Mattresses. And I'm sure an occasional toke helps to take the edge off on any battlefield.

Nevertheless, this revelation explains a fair bit about our rebels. The stylin' scarves. The designer camouflage gear. The natty shades. Hey, these are guys who like to get stoned and then pose in front of the mirror.

Explains a certain lack of results on the battlefield too. It's hard to get motivated to kill other folks when you've been smoking hash. "Hey Faisal, it's time to attack!"

"What?"

"Let's go, we're attacking!"

"Attacking?.....fuck man..... that was good stuff... attacking where?"

"Dammit Faisal, get off the damn mattress. We're routing Gaddafi's bastards!"

"What?  Again!... OK man, give me a minute. Just wanna twist up another spliff...C'mon Mustafa, this is good stuff. Afghani."

"Oh alright, but hey man, we're gonna get Gaddafi's guys good tomorrow."

I'm thinking this last phase of the liberation of the Libyan oil fields might take a little longer than we expected.
And congratulations to Ryan Lucas for having had the good luck to get embedded with these guys.

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